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I have written about the importance of preparing and staging a home for sale. Realtors and Home Stagers fully understand the strategy behind it and we can push our client’s pretty hard because we want the best for them. We want them to reach their goals and get the highest return on their investment. Today, I felt it was important to remind ourselves that a home can be more than a monetary investment. For a seller, it may also be an emotional investment. A home holds memories of life gone by, hard work and a sense of security in the world. The process of letting go can bring excitement about the future but it can also bring a sense of sadness and loss. There are lots of reasons for selling a home like, moving up, a growing family or a new job! But, there are also reasons that aren’t so exciting. You see, I know, because I’ve experienced them first hand.
My “marriage” home was a fixer upper. I poured my heart and soul into it. I brought my babies home to it. I learned how to garden, raised pets, buried pets, loved, lived and thought I would die there. It was never meant to be a starter home and although it was the first, it was a forever home. So when I got a divorce and had to leave, it was like cutting off an arm.
Last year, I experienced selling my childhood home. My parents had built that house and raised 4 daughters there. Though I had grown up and moved away, I always knew where “home” was and I visited my mother often. There were memories in every corner. I couldn’t walk down the hall without remembering our cat always had her kittens in that closet. The Christmas tree was always in the same corner. Many holiday parties and I could still see my family gathered in the kitchen. When mom passed, friends and neighbors stopped in to talk about the old days. The house held memories for them too. As the trustee and a professional home stager (thank god), I carried out my duties and knew what had to be done. The packing, donating, sorting, painting, fixing and staging was stressful enough. Each step of the process felt like I was erasing an entire era. It felt like I was betraying my memories. The loss of a parent and then the family home was, at times, unbearable. It was difficult just to call a Realtor. By the time I found myself at the closing table, I was numb.
I think it was a survival tactic put forth by my brain.
Next week I get to do it again. Ugh. This time it’s my aunt’s home that my mother had inherited. Although I didn’t grow up there, it still holds memories and a nostalgic tie to family and the past. It also represents pleasant and exciting dreams of the future. I tried to keep it. I wanted to own it and retire in that warm place with tropical breezes. But alas, it’s not in the cards. The trip will be bitter sweet. I will say my goodbye’s and there will again be tears.
So Realtors and Home Stagers alike….remember, the house you are excited to get your hands on, can hold a lot for the seller. At times, they might seem difficult to work with. At times your meeting may seem like a counseling session when all you want to do is paint and replace that hideous tile or get your sign in the front yard. Be there for them! Be gentle, be kind and respectful. Listen and understand that detaching can be like letting go of a life, love or dream.
©Staging Consultants, LLC 2017
I have been helping people prepare and stage their homes for sale for over 10 years and I love doing it!